Sunday, August 24, 2025

Robert vs Hunter

robertschofield882@gmail.com

 I wanted to inquire whether Contract Law or Commercial Lease Agreement falls within the scope of your firm's practice. Your firm was referred to me by the state bar referral service.


Thank you for your time, and I look forward to your response.

Best regards,
Robert Schofield


XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Yes we do!

Aaron

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX



Hello Aaron S Thompson,

Thank you for getting back to me regarding my request for potential legal representation.

I would like to engage your services to draft a commercial lease agreement between my company and Dickerson Well Drilling, Inc.,  located in your state. We are currently negotiating the terms of a 12-month lease for our DP3 Well Intervention Equipment, in anticipation of their upcoming contract.

We will need your assistance with the following:

  • Drafting the lease agreement

  • Reviewing the required lease documentation

  • Providing legal advice if necessary (we will handle the core negotiations)

The total value of this transaction is approximately $3,400,000, which will be managed by my company. We aim to begin this project in the second week of October 2025. To facilitate the process, I will provide you with copies of our previous lease agreements for reference.

Please send over a retainer agreement based on your hourly rate. I estimate this project will require no more than 20 hours of your time. My schedule is quite full this week, but I’d like to review your retainer agreement and then set a time to discuss the lease draft and next steps.

If you have any questions or need further information, don’t hesitate to reach out.


Lessee Conflict Check:
Unsuspecting Local Company Name Here


I am available Monday to Friday, from 11:00 AM to 4:00 PM. You can reach me at the number listed in my signature below. Let me know your availability so we can coordinate accordingly.

I look forward to working with you on this project.

Regards,

 

Robert Schofield
President
Shamrock Well & Pump
45 Industrial Road
Suite 207
Cumberland , RI 02864
📞 401-889-2033 (Direct)
📱 656-789-2203 (WhatsApp Only)


XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX


Dear Mr. Schofield,

Well, hellfire and hydraulic pressure—$3.4 million worth of hot, spinning steel and contractual peril. I can already smell the diesel fumes and existential liability wafting off this DP3 monstrosity like a fever dream in a West Texas sandstorm.

You want a lease? Good. You need a lease. Because without one, my friend, you’re one busted valve away from a courtroom rodeo with no saddle. I’ll draft the document. I’ll read the fine print with the paranoia of a man who once watched a judge cry over a lost wrench. And if things go sideways—and they always try to—I’ll be ready to push the button labeled “Legal Advice” and brace for impact.

Conflict check is clear. Dickerson’s not on my blacklist… yet.

Here's how we’ll ride this beast:

  • Hourly Rate: $1000 an hour (don't worry, no gold-plated invoices—just the blood, sweat, and ink).

  • Retainer Agreement: En route shortly. Clean, sharp, and easy on the eyes.

  • Estimated Hours: 20? Sure. But like drilling into shale, you never know what kind of pressure’s hiding down there.

  • Timeline: Second week of October? That gives us just enough time to draft, revise, and mutter darkly about indemnification clauses under flickering fluorescent lights.

Send me the old leases. I’ll cannibalize the best parts and toss the rest into the fires of modern jurisprudence.

I’m around this week, mostly lucid between 12 and 3 PM Pacific. Let me know when you’re free and we’ll sync up—no tie required.

Hold fast.
Aaron S Thompson
Attorney-at-Law, Dream Wrangler, Occasional Scribe


XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Tuesday, August 5, 2025

Talking Fargo with Stephen Gardner

Stephen Gardner 
stephengardner7273@gmail.com

CONSULTATION



Hello,
I am reaching out to schedule a time to discuss an environmental law matter. Does your firm do such legal work?

Please email your convenient date and time for a telephone call.


Stephen Gardner, Owner
Dns Disposal LLC.


XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

You betcha we do.



XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX



Hello Best Cannabis Lawyer This Side of That Side,

We are a waste management company interested in building a long-lasting Attorney-Client Relationship with your law firm to handle both our present and future environmental law matters, with Advice concerning environmental issues in financing and business transactions in OR. We're looking forward to setting up a branch office in OR before the end of the year 2025. In the meantime, Affordable Junk Removal is interested in purchasing my 2000 R-Tech HD 3850 Dual Shaft Shredder. I have discussed and agreed to sell the Shredder to Affordable Junk Removal 6639 SE 65th Ave, Portland, OR 97206. I need your legal services to prepare a PSA / Bill of sale and to handle sales through closing. The purchase price and terms have been agreed by both parties. 

The 2000 R-Tech HD 3850 Dual Shaft Shredder and agreed terms are attached. 

Being that this is my first time working with your firm, I would like to ask a few questions, Is this something you have handled in the past? Can you get this done? What is your rate and required retainer fee for this kind of work? Can you email your engagement agreement for my perusal.

I look forward to working with you!

Sincerely,

Stephen Gardner, Owner
DNS Disposal LLC
8 Boxcar Blvd,
Tewksbury, MA 01876
Phone: (401) 830-0069



XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX


Oh yah, hi there Stephen!

Well gosh, thanks for reachin’ out like that. We’d sure be happy to help you out with the sale of your big ol’ R-Tech HD 3850 Dual Shaft Shredder—sounds like quite the unit, don’tcha know. And it’s always nice to see folks lookin’ to build somethin’ long-term and respectable, y’know?

Now, as far as your questions go:

  • Oh yah, we’ve definitely handled purchase agreements and bill o’ sales for equipment sales just like this. Nothin’ too outta the ordinary—well, aside from the shredder itself, which sounds like it could chew through a hockey rink, if ya let it.

  • Yup, we can absolutely get this done for ya, no problem there.

  • As for the rate and retainer, we usually start with a small retainer—I'll have my team send over the engagement letter so you can give it a gander, no pressure. It lays out everything plain as lefse.

I'll go ahead and review those attached terms, and we’ll get that engagement agreement over to ya real soon so you can take a peek and decide how you’d like to proceed.

Thanks again for reachin’ out, Stephen. Lookin’ forward to helpin’ you get this done and maybe even workin’ together down the road when you set up shop in Oregon.

Best wishes and warm regards.


- AP Fargo





XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX


Aaron,

Thanks for the update. Kindly forward your engagement letter for my review and signature.



Regards


XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX. FEE AGREEMENT 




XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX


Hello [My Name Here],

This is to confirm that DNS Disposal LLC has officially retained your firm to represent us in this sale transaction. Please note that your firm will be representing DNS Disposal LLC only in this matter. Attached is the signed engagement letter for your records.

Following further discussions with the buyer, some additional terms have been mutually agreed upon, and I would like these terms to be included in the contract you will prepare. These have been verbally discussed and confirmed with the buyer. Please note that Affordable Junk Removal will be represented by their broker.

The key terms are as follows:

The buyer will provide an initial deposit (Earnest Money), which will also cover the attorney retainer fees.

The Earnest Money will be no less than 60% of the total purchase price ($158,500), and the deposit will also include attorney fees. Please note, the attorney fees deducted from the initial deposit are non-refundable.

The remaining balance of the purchase price will be paid in full before the equipment is shipped, contingent upon the buyer's satisfactory inspection of the equipment.

The buyer's broker will provide a formal Letter of Intent detailing the transaction at the time of the initial deposit.

Kindly confirm how you would prefer the initial deposit and retainer check to be made out, as well as the mailing address for the payment.

I will provide your contact details to the buyer's representatives. The Earnest Money ($95,100) and Letter of Intent will be addressed to your firm. 

You will deduct your attorney fee of $7,500 along with some additional amount as compensation for your time serving as an escrow agent on behalf of our company. The remaining balance will be held in trust pending further instructions.

I look forward to your confirmation and response. Thank you for your assistance.


XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Oh yah, hi there Stephen!

Thanks kindly for the update there — much appreciated.

We got the signed engagement letter on our end, all snug and tidy in the file now, so that’s just great. Real nice to be workin’ with folks who keep things buttoned up, y’know? And rest assured, we understand we’re representin’ DNS Disposal LLC only in this here transaction — no confusion there, nope.

Now, about them updated terms — sounds like you and the buyer have yourselves a real solid understanding. Sixty percent earnest money, coverin’ our retainer and then some, with the rest due after inspection — well, that’s just good sense. And we’ll be sure to bake that right into the PSA, clear as day, so everyone’s on the same page and no one's callin' anyone after supper with questions. You have to be careful with these scammers and such.

As for the deposit, you can have the check made out to Fargo Law, PLLC, and just go ahead and send it to:

Fargo Law, PLLC
220 Second Ave S, Suite Home Alabama
Seattle, WA 98104
Attn: Trust Accounting – DNS Disposal Deal

And once we’ve got the check and the Letter of Intent from the buyer’s broker, we’ll get things rollin’. We’ll deduct the $7,500 fee like you mentioned, and then set aside the remainder in our trust account — safe and sound until closing instructions come in. Happy to serve as escrow agent on this one — we’ll treat it like grandma’s lefse recipe: careful hands and no shortcuts.

Appreciate you entrustin’ us with this — we’re lookin’ forward to seein’ it through without any hiccups, lawsuits, or loose bolts.

Talk soon now — and do keep us posted when that LOI and check are on their way, eh?

Warmest regards,

Best Darn Washington Cannabis Lawyer Around


XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

On Aug 21, 2025, at 8:41 AM, Stephen Gardner <stephengardner7273@gmail.com> wrote:

Hey Super Lawyer,


I think the address you gave me is incorrect. FedEx delivery service is trying to deliver the packages but was told the address is incorrect. Should I send you the tracking number to track and see for yourself?


Regards


XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Oh yah, hi there Stephen! Yes. You best send over to me. 



XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX


Hey Bad Mass Mo Fo

Thanks for the update, Lawyer of the Year. Please see tracking number below.


883599594840



Regards

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX 

Oh yah, Stephen, looks like I goofed there, don’tcha know. My bad. That ain’t my address. The right one’s [My addresss with the wrong zip code]. By the way, did ya happen to send my retainer, then?

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx




Monday, August 4, 2025

Cheech and Terry

Terry Martinson <terrymartinsonoffice05@gmail.com> 

Cannabis matter


Does your firm handle cannabis law matters?


XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX


We do.


XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX


Hello ________,

I would like to start a lasting relationship with your law firm to help handle legal issues in cannabis transactions in California. AMERICAN CANNABIS COMPANY, 1313 A, 1313 Ocean Front Walk, Venice, CA 90291 wants to buy my two GreenBroz N-Line Trimming Machines and Harvest Bud Sorter Systems.

I want to request that you help with the sales contract and guide the transaction to its completion. Both parties have settled on the terms, cost price, taxation, and terms of delivery. Here are the detailed specifications on the GreenBroz N-Line Trimming Machines and Harvest Bud Sorter Systems.

Is your firm able to help out with this? How much do you charge and what is required for a retainer for this work? Would you please send me a copy of the engagement agreement for my review as well?

Thank you for your time.


Terry Martinson
381 S Ames St #E307,
Lakewood, CO 80226
(303) 607-5135


XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX


Hey Terry,

Far out, man — thanks for reaching out. This is exactly the kind of gig we dig. I mean, cannabis equipment sales? In California? Between Venice Beach and Lakewood? It's like the Super Bud of transactions — laid-back vibes, but it still needs to be airtight.

So yeah, our firm totally handles this kind of work. We'll make sure your deal is legally dialed in, everyone stays compliant, and nobody accidentally ends up trading a trimmer for a surfboard.

Here’s what we’ll handle:

  • Drafting a solid sales contract

  • Making sure the tax and delivery terms are clean and enforceable

  • Ensuring you’re covered if anything goes sideways

  • Guiding the whole transaction from “whoa” to “done deal”

Retainer & Fees:
We usually start with a flat $15,000 retainer for straightforward equipment transactions like this. If things stay groovy and simple, we’ll likely come in under that. If it gets complicated (like they want to pay you in crypto or weed coin or something), we’ll check in before going any further.

I’ll shoot over an engagement agreement for your review shortly. You can e-sign it or print it out and roll it into a paper airplane, but e-sign is faster.

Looking forward to working with you, brother.

Peace, pot, and legal protection,

- AP Chong



XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

terrymartinsonoffice05@gmail.com

Sounds good, let's do it.


XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I send this fee agreement








XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX


Excellent Cannabis Lawyer,

I have signed and attached below the retainer agreement. After discussing further with the buyer, more terms need to be included in the sales contract. The buyer’s broker will act on behalf of the buyer.

As agreed, the buyer will make an earnest money deposit of at least 55% of the purchase price ($90,120.00) covering attorney fees which are non-refundable, final inspection, insurance, and service parts for six months. The balance is due before shipment, after satisfactory inspection.

The buyer’s broker will provide a letter of intent with transaction details at the time of deposit.

Please confirm how the deposit check should be made out and your mailing address. I’ll share this with the buyer’s representative. Let me know once they reach out.

Thank you,


XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX


Yo Terry,

Righteous move, my dude — I saw the signed fee agreement come through. That’s the legal version of lighting it up and passing it to the left. Appreciate you making it official.

Sounds like the buyer’s crew added a few more twists to the sesh, huh? No sweat. We can totally bake those into the contract. We’ll make sure the earnest money deposit, broker reps, inspection, and insurance vibes are all legally airtight — nothing harshes the mellow like a busted clause.

As for the deposit check, have it made out to Best Washington Cannabis Lawyer, PLLC — that’s our official legal dojo. You can send it via old-school snail mail to:

Cheech Law, PLLC
220 Second Ave S, Suite 1600
Seattle, WA 98104
Attn: AP Chong (or just write “Legal Wizard” — it’ll still get to me)

Let the buyer’s rep know they can hit me up directly — phone, email, smoke signals — I’m ready. Once they send over the letter of intent, we’ll line everything up like dominos and nudge it forward.

Appreciate you looping me in on this righteous ride. Let’s get this gear moved and the good vibes flowing.

Keep it sticky,

AP Chong
Cheech Law, PLLC